- -
It was seven o'clock on a Saturday morning as Amy approached the Browns' front
door. She felt worried that an angry family member would answer the door, awoken
from their sleep, but she had to do this because she needed to see Ephram. She
needed to. Tentatively she rang the doorbell, and then held her breath.
A few minutes passed by, almost enough to make Amy turn around and head home,
but then Dr. Brown answered the door. "Amy," he said cheerfully. "What are you
doing here so early?"
Amy pushed out an invisible cloud of air from her lungs. "I'm sorry to be
here so early, I just..." She looked down at her hands that kept interlocking
and separating nervously. "Is Ephram here?"
"He's still asleep," Dr. Brown informed her, checking the time on his
wristwatch.
"Oh..." Amy said, her voice disappointed and her heart breaking. This was no
ordinary morning.
"But if you want to risk his wrath, you're welcome to go wake him up," said
Dr. Brown, sensing that Amy was here for something important. "He's not the most
pleasant kid in the morning, but then again, who is? And he surely won't be as
moody around you as he is me."
Amy tried to smile. "So I can see him?"
Dr. Brown nodded, and stepped aside to let Amy enter the house. She followed
him to Ephram's closed bedroom door. "Good luck," Dr. Brown said, then sauntered
away.
Amy thought of knocking, but then decided against it. She stood, staring at
the closed wooden door, for long minutes, trying to decide if this was a good
idea or not. If Ephram would be mad for the awakening. If he would be happy to
see her at all.
Finally, she slowly turned the doorknob, and crept quietly into the room. All
of the lights were off, but there was weak sunlight shining in through the
window that helped her to see and find her way to Ephram's bed. She just watched
him for a moment, sleeping, breathing. He was beautiful. He didn't look as
tortured in sleep, as though none of his worries were on his mind. Amy often
wondered if she was one of his worries.
She bent down to untie her shoelaces, and slip her tennis shoes off. In
socked feet, she approached the side of Ephram's bed. Then she was left
standing, not sure what to do. She needed to feel herself near him, needed to
feel his arms around her. Accidentally, she let a sob escape from her throat. At
the sudden noise, Ephram stirred in his sleep. He readjusted his body position,
and exhaled a deep breath, then opened his eyes. There stood Amy, hugging
herself as if she were cold, waiting to see what would happen next.
"Amy?" Ephram said, disbelieving that she was so near to him right as he
awoke. His voice was a bit scratchy from sleep, so he cleared his throat. "Amy?"
he tried again.
"Ephram..." Amy uncrossed her arms and they fell limp at her sides. "I can
leave, I... I just... I didn't know where else to go."
Ephram frowned, concerned. Tears were shining in her eyes. "Are you okay?" he
asked.
Amy let out a pitiful sound, then started openly sobbing. The crystal tears
from her eyes fell to her cheeks, flooding her face with her inner pain. She
didn't speak; she just cried.
Very few times before had Ephram felt such compassion. He scooted over to
make room on the bed, and lifted the covers so Amy could crawl in beside him.
Which she did. She sniffled as she curled up into a little ball and shivered.
The room was cold. Ephram quickly covered her with the sheets and comforter,
trying to warm her body, if not her heart.
Sleepy, but trying his best to become more alert, Ephram delicately wiped the
tears from Amy's face. The tears that kept falling. Amy never cried. She was so
strong, so capable of keeping herself together. Something had definitely
happened.
Amy straightened out her legs in order to inch closer to her boyfriend. He
laid in only his boxers, his lean chest exposed. He didn't know if touching her,
reaching for her, would be the best thing to do at that moment, so instead, he
fought the urge, and asked, "Are you okay?"
Amy sniffled.
"What's wrong?" Ephram tried.
Amy's voice shook as she whispered, "I want to feel close to you, Ephram.
Closer than I've ever felt before."
Tentatively she took her t-shirt off and cast it aside. Then she snuggled in
closer to Ephram, putting her hands over her heart, and bowing her head so that
her face rested in the hollow of Ephram's neck. Her bra felt like silk, and
Ephram felt like the luckiest guy in the world. Here was this girl, this
unbelievable girl, and she was all his. She was in distress, and she came to
him. Him.
He wrapped his arms around her slim body, the silky softness of her bra
pressing into his nipples. Chest against chest, skin against skin.
"Is this close enough?" he asked. "Better?"
"Better..." Amy's voice was muffled from being in the hollow of Ephram's
neck. Tenderly she kissed him there, then pulled back just slightly so she could
look him in the face. She wiped away the spots where her tears had wet his skin.
"I'm sorry I woke you up." Her voice was pitiful, and still full of unshed
tears.
"I think I'll survive."
Another tear rolled slowly down Amy's cheek as she smiled slightly. "I know I
probably should have called or e-mailed you, or... something, but..."
"It's okay."
"I needed you."
"I'm here."
Amy encircled her arms around Ephram and hugged him tight. He wiped away that
stray tear, and then leaned in so carefully, unsure how close she wanted him to
get. "Can I kiss you?" he asked. "Maybe I can kiss it better."
Amy leaned in and softly touched her lips to Ephram's. She sobbed into his
mouth, but continued the kiss, caressing the skin of his back with her
fingertips. It was sweet, like a first kiss, their mouths moving together in a
rhythmic motion. It lasted for a long moment, and Amy felt deprived when it was
over, and she pulled away.
"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" asked Ephram. "Or do I have to
guess? 'Cause, you know, I could, I'm pretty good at that kind of thing, and
there's any number of things that could be wrong, what with school just
starting, and living with Bright, and - - "
"I saw Colin," Amy said.
"In a dream?" Ephram asked.
"No... he's always in my dreams." She inhaled, then exhaled. "I saw him in
the graveyard. Yesterday, while I was cleaning my room, I found this ring that
he had given me on our one month anniversary, and I just crumbled. I had been
doing so well, getting over him, and this just took me back, to every minute in
the hospital, to finding out about his death..."
Sensing more tears coming, Ephram kissed her again, slow and tender. It was
the only way he could think of to calm her down. "So you went to the graveyard."
"I went there yesterday afternoon, to visit him. Because I've stopped doing
that as regularly as I used to. I brought him a white rose, and placed it on his
grave, and I read his headstone for the thousandth time, even though the words
and the design are forever etched in my memory."
Ephram stroked her arm comfortingly, encouraging her to go on.
"I stood up, after placing the flower on his grave, and I stared down at
where he lay. Just stared. For the longest time. The wind picked up and sent my
hair flying across my face. I looked up, and I stopped breathing, because there
he was."
"Colin?"
Amy sobbed and held Ephram tightly.
"I felt like I was going crazy," she said. "I had seen him once before, when
I was on drugs, but this time I was completely sober, and he was just... there.
He didn't smile. He looked so sad. I wanted to hug him so bad, I wanted to tell
him that I love him, that I always will... I wanted him to know that I miss him.
But the wind blew my hair in front of my face again, and when I tucked it behind
my ears, he was gone..."
Amy looked intensely at Ephram. "He was gone," she repeated. "He left me,
again."
"He knows you love him, Amy."
"He doesn't know anything!" Amy cried. "He's dead! He's dead! And he's never
coming back... and I'm never going to get over that."
Ephram opened his mouth, and then closed it. He didn't know what to say, how
to make this girl that he loved so much feel better.
"Make me feel better," Amy said, suddenly determined. "Make me forget. Just
even for a minute."
Ephram met her eyes, and saw so much panic and sadness within them.
Amy touched the tight muscles of Ephram's torso, moving her fingers over
every ripple. His skin was so smooth against her hands. He tenderly stroked her
arm, fingering the thin strap of her bra that settled comfortably on her
shoulder. He wanted more, he just wasn't sure what she wanted.
"What did you do?" he asked. "After seeing Colin?"
"I fell to my knees. They just collapsed from under me. And then I threw up
on his grave. On the flower that I brought just for him."
"I think he would forgive you."
"Why did I see him, Ephram? Am I going crazy?..."
Ephram kissed Amy's shoulder, then made a trail of butterfly kisses up the
side of her neck. She leaned in and kissed his lips, hers slightly trembling.
"No," Ephram said firmly, and he meant it. "You could never be crazy. Except
maybe for the fact that you're going out with me."
Amy parted her lips and captured Ephram's once again, this time sliding her
tongue along his bottom lip, asking for entrance to his mouth. She couldn't come
up with quips to his sarcasm today; all she could do was love him. Be with him.
Be close to him. Ephram caught her cue and opened his mouth, allowing her tongue
to enter and explore. He thought back to the first time he dreamed of kissing
her, and how he had woken up with wet sheets. And he started to get hard. He
tangled his tongue in with hers, tasting her.
As his member grew in size, Amy could feel it against her stomach. She gasped
and pulled away. "Ephram..." She looked down at the swell in his boxers, then
looked back up into his eyes that were afraid of being let down. "Do you really
love me?"
"I think I've always loved you."
"Show me," she whispered, taking his hand and placing it on her breast,
covered only by her silky bra. Afraid of going too far too fast, Ephram worked
slowly. He gently placed a hand underneath Amy's back and unclipped her bra,
then slipped it off her shoulders lovingly. There, before him, was something he
had been waiting to see since the moment he first saw this girl's face. Her
creamy breasts were right in front of his eyes.
Ephram's fingers tingled, sensing already the sensation of touching that
white flesh. "Go ahead," Amy whispered. "Make me think of something else. Make
me forget."
There were so many things about Colin that Amy wanted to forget. All the
hours at the hospital of watching him with machines aiding him to breathe,
watching him crumble and fail at everything when he was brought back to life.
Dr. Brown's face when he announced that Colin had passed away. Both of Amy's
visions of Colin... It was all just too much. She had loved him too much. She
loved him still. She didn't want to forget why, she just wanted to forget why
that love wasn't enough.
Ephram, clearly an amateur at this, wasn't sure what to do, where to start.
He placed a finger on Amy's left breast, and made slow circles around her nipple
that hardened the closer he got to it. He touched it, and Amy gasped. "More,"
she pleaded. He slowly climbed over her and settled his body on top of hers, and
then took her nipple into his mouth. Amy sighed, letting everything leave her
mind, wanting to feel this, and only this.
Savoring her taste, Ephram swirled his tongue all around the nipple, then
lightly bit down on the point. "Mmm," Amy mumbled, wriggling beneath him. With
his other hand, Ephram began massaging the other breast. All the while, he just
couldn't believe this was happening. Couldn't believe that it wasn't a dream,
one of the many dreams he has had over the past couple of years.
He took his mouth from Amy's nipple and placed both hands on her breasts,
fondling them gently, lovingly. With his mouth, he made a trail of kisses down
her flat, smooth stomach, to the waist of her jeans. Skillfully, he abandoned
one breast to use his hand to unbutton and un-zipper the top of Amy's jeans. She
started breathing more quickly, sensing what was to come.
Ephram slid off of her, afraid he was depriving her of air, and began to
slide her pants down her legs. Amy helped to kick them and the covers off,
obviously as ready for this as Ephram. That gave him comfort. Somehow he felt
that if she didn't respond, he was taking advantage of her.
Amy's jeans landed silently on the carpet beside the bed. Only one piece of
clothing on Ephram's girl still remained. Silky black panties. He almost hated
to remove them, with how sexy they looked, but he definitely wanted to explore
what was underneath.
Ephram's fingers glided beneath the material at the waist of Amy's panties,
and slowly, seductively, he slid them off her body. Down past her smooth, silky
legs, over her feet with pink painted toenails. The bit of sunlight streaming in
through the window illuminated her beauty as she lay naked before him. Ephram
sucked in his breath, and tried to regain a normal breathing pattern.
"What's wrong?" Amy asked, self consciously.
"You take my breath away," he said in all honesty.
Amy gave a slight giggle, which made Ephram hopeful that what he was doing
was making her feel better. He now had her, to hold, to touch, to love with all
his heart. Carefully, he brought a finger to Amy's clit, and found that it was
swollen. He circled it with his thumb, then leaned down to suck on it. Amy
covered her mouth to keep from crying out at the pleasure. Nobody had ever
touched that part of her before.
Moving his tongue from her clit to her inner core, Ephram tasted her juices.
She was soaked. He had noticed that fact when he pulled her panties down her
legs. His tongue exploring her insides felt orgasmic. Amy squirmed. "Ephram,
I... Ephram... Don't stop..."
Ephram sat up, removing his tongue from inside of her. Amy groaned with
displeasure until Ephram's finger entered her. Instantly his finger was soaked.
His penis was so hard, he didn't know how long he'd be able to last. But this
was for Amy.
Ephram began slowly pumping his finger in and out of Amy's core. Amy thought
of Colin. She thought of him as a child - - Ephram pumped - - she thought of him
on the day he revealed that he liked her, that she was more than just Bright's
little sister - - Ephram pumped faster. She thought of their first kiss, and the
way Colin was so much more skilled with his lips than she was - - Ephram
inserted a second finger. Amy thought of Colin in his hospital bed, on the verge
of death - - Ephram pumped harder, and faster.
Amy crushed her head back into the pillow, lost in memories and ecstasy.
Make me forget, make me forget, make me forget... Ephram pumped and pumped.
He could feel Amy's inner muscles starting to clench around his fingers. She
moaned, and closed her eyes, tight, clenching her fists around the bed sheet.
She thought of Colin in the graveyard, staring at her in his solemn way. "I have
always loved you," Ephram told her, watching the expression on Amy's
face, despite her closed eyes.
When Amy moaned louder from the pleasure, Ephram was quick to meet her lips
with his and smother her sounds so that nobody else in the house would hear. Her
moans got lost within his mouth. As her tongue tangled with Ephram's, he could
hold it in no longer. He exploded in his boxers. Amy, beneath him, could feel
the wetness, and saw the kind of impact she had on her boyfriend.
A few more pumps, and she was lost in ecstasy. She screamed into Ephram's
mouth as she came, shuddering, shuddering. She saw Colin, saw him smile just
slightly, then saw him fade away.
Ephram pulled his fingers out of her pussy and brought them to his mouth,
licking off her juices, tasting her again.
Amy turned to face the other side of the bed, and Ephram wrapped his arms
around her from behind. He felt a little embarrassed that he had wet himself
with semen, but crushed her body to his all the same. "Did I help you forget?
Did I help even a little?"
A solemn tear coursed its way down Amy's cheek, hidden from Ephram. "Yes,"
she whispered. "Thank you."
Ephram kissed a sensitive spot behind Amy's ear, holding her as she trembled
from the aftershock of her first orgasm. He sucked her ear lobe into his mouth,
and she shivered.
"You know," began Ephram playfully, "anytime you need to forget, I'm always
here."
Amy laughed, and pulled Ephram's arms more tightly around her body. Secure in
his embrace, she closed her eyes, and let everything in her mind wash away,
searching for peace. "I know."
- -
end
